How do I handle a vindictive sibling who fabricates stories and files legal cases against family members?

I have a sibling who always threatens people who antagonize her with a legal suit. She fabricates stories and would hire a good lawyer to represent her in court cases. The sad thing here is she is very good in convincing people that she has been wronged. She writes poison letters that could actually destroy a person's reputation. She does not spare anyone (not even her family). I don't think it is right to drag innocent people into the legal cases she files. Anyone who crosses her is sure bound to be the target of her vindictiveness. How do we deal with her?How do I handle a vindictive sibling who fabricates stories and files legal cases against family members?
Cut off all contact. Tell her you're not going to be a part of her life if she chooses to relate to people these ways.





Dana (attorney, M.S. Counseling)How do I handle a vindictive sibling who fabricates stories and files legal cases against family members?
I believe the operative word here is vindictive. Obviously, your sibling feels wronged in some way and is therefore reacting with torts of her own. Please remember that she is family and work toward reconciliation. Start with asking what it is that she is so angry about. Do not point out, what ever you say to her, that she may be completely self centered.
Sometime it's a good thing to serperate youself from the person thats is causing the problem.You need to think about you own mental health and if your sister could be a problem maybe you should tell her in a nice way the way you feel(if a letter would be better do that) .I think you need to let your sister know how you feel .
Hitman.





Haha. JK.





I have no idea.
Sometimes you have to break or destroy something before you are able to put things right.





This sibling is going to continue this forever in order to fill some gap in her life. It is a power thing. The family has to stop buying into it.





It sucks (been there) but a stance must be made. You start with yourself and you no longer wish to have anything to do with her....... maybe someday but not now. The rest of the family follows suit. Friends as well.





If she wants to fabricate and threaten to sue so be it. Odds are when she has nobody listening, nobody to play against another and nobody to whine to she will be forced to look inward at herself. She will have lost her perceived power and will have to make an effort to get back in good graces.





Again it can feel hurtfull. But there is no reason that others should suffer because of one person. Poison letters just drag everybody down. Life, love and family mean all.





As an aside.... do you not have one parent, aunt, uncle, husband, brother in law or whatever that will just bottomline it and tell her to pound sand?
Your question is so much like someone I know, that I wondered if you live near me. And my family (myself) has been the target of her actions, which when it comes down to it.. are based on delusional beliefs on her part. She retaliated against my daughter and husband (her son) for MOVING against her wishes.. and got away with it, because the kids were too scared to testify against her.


I absolutely believe that (in my instance) the woman is mentally disturbed, and is completely incapable of seeing her actions as based in her own fabrications. A huge problem in her ';circle'; is gossip.. making false statements concerning persons, who are not there to be able to point out the falsity of her statements. That, and demands/ expectations of loyalty from relatives (guilt trips) give her backing. By Alienating and turning persons against each other, there always is ';sides taking'; that does not need to occur, and would not occur if persons had facts to deal with.


I can't start to describe the damage that has been caused. A lawyer CANNOT approach someone against the wishes of their client.. this does not mean that someone cannot put the facts into writing, and send to the lawyer, clearly giving reasons why the client is incorrect and/or lying. Delusional persons don't recognize lies.. they believe what they say. I did exactly this, sending a courteous but factual letter to one lawyer, and I think it may have caused him to drop her. They CAN be penalized if they knowingly allow a client to lie to the court, or pursue a frivolous lawsuit.


As hard as it is.. I realize you love your sibling, but I strongly suggest you distance yourself (and kids) as far as you can. You might even write her a letter... calmly stating your feelings and why. Trying to talk or reason with someone like this, is not possible.. they twist every thing that you say.


At some point, she will drag someone into court and get stopped by a judge. That is, as long as someone is willing to present facts and clearly show what she is doing.


I TRULY know how difficult this is for you.


http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/鈥?/a>


You might see if this fits your sibling.